From outside and even from inside, many people think the place where I live (whose name I do not wish to recall) is a civilized country, relatively modern and similar to other normal European countries. It is an alleged democracy (rulers let us to vote once each four years, wow!!!), it is in the European Union, in the NATO, it takes part in the Eurovision Song Contest, and its army helps the Empire in humanitarian massacres like Afghanistan and Iraq.
However, often, and lately more often, since the extreme right-wing and the catholic church are ruling again, there are news showing the deep medieval side of this nation.
At Beniarrés, a town of 1.300 inhabitants, the catholic priest has published a question list to help people to confess their sins (¿Vives en la fornicación, eres homosexual?). This questionnaire is a list of questions, gathered in each of the Ten Commandments, to help the sinners to recognise their sins; for example, the title of this pòst is one of the questions.
Let’s glance the questions. Before to begin, two warnings: 1) I want to make clear that it was written just a few weeks ago, in December 2013, not in 1013 or 513, because one can hesitate when read some of the questions; 2) I’ve placed this post in the Category Jokes because it’s hilarious, but don’t get wrong, it’s absolutely real, you can look at the link above.
The following is the literal copy, translated from Spanish, of the questionnaire (with no pictures, that is something I couldn’t help adding). Read and enjoy it:
1. You shall love God above all else
Do I love Jesus Christ? Do I read the word of the Lord? Do I pray every day? Do I practice witchcraft? White or black magic? Am I part of an esoteric group? Do I partake in pagan sacrifices?
2. You shall not take the name of God in vain
Have I blasphemed? Have I spoken badly of God? Of the Church? Of the priests?
3. Remember to keep holy the Lord’s Day
Do I work on Sunday to earn money and not only for glory of God and charity? Do I make my employees to work on Sunday?
4. Honor your father and your mother
Do I love my parents? Do I respect my bosses? Do I pray for the authorities? Do I encourage couples to marry? Do I fight against the practice of divorce and unmarried couples?
5. You shall not kill
Have I had an abortion? Have I recommended an abortion? Do I kill with poison? With witchcraft? Do I practice euthanasia or abortion? Do I practice torture? Do I promote kidnappings, terrorism? Do I buy / hear media that promote evil?
6. You shall not commit adultery
Do I respect the body of my wife, my husband? Do I do unchaste sex with him, with her? Her / his body is for me only an object of pleasure? Do I frequent prostitutes? Have I gone through a sterilization surgery? Have I subjected my wife to a sterilization surgery?
|Hand Scroll, Beijing late 19th century – Wikimedia Commons|
7. You shall not steal
Have I done embezzlement? Do I forge receipts? Do I gamble with money? Do I buy expensive clothes? Do I refuse to pay my debts? Don’t I pay the contribution for Church? Do I pay low wages?
8. You shall not bear false witness against your neighbour
Do I cheat gambling? Do I do false promises? Do I adulate for my interest?
9. You shall not covet your neighbour’s wife
Do I read books, watch porn movies? Do I masturbate? Do I live in fornication? Debauchery? Do I give my body for money? Am I homosexual? Have I had a relationship with an animal? Have I committed incest? Pedophilia?
|Tako to ama, by Katsushika Hokusai, 1814 – Wikimedia Commons|
10. You shall not covet your neighbour’s goods
Do I envy others? Do I beg easily? Do I waste time instead of doing my job?
That’s all, folks. Very informative, isn’t it? Definitely, this questionnaire will be very useful, for example for those who murdered someone and had forgotten it or didn’t know that it’s sin. It makes sense.
Speaking for myself, I’ve found sixteen sins in the list, not bad at all. It should be enough to reach the hell, I hope.